GHOSTS OF CHOCOLATE ADD SPICE TO CHOOK

A great event last night at Abbotsford, where head chef Steve 'Jamie Oliver' Flick, worked the colander and pepper grinder in delivering a gastronomic feast of cunning running. The weather was warm, but the breeze made perambulatory conditions reasonably pleasant (and a nice change from the recent stormy wet stuff) as diners gathered at the old quarantine station for the culinary fray. There was anticipation in the air. Dry mouths looked to a nutty amontillado. The BNO wait staff straightened their uniforms and brought forth the nibbles. Barry 'Nat King' Cole was seen with the tip jar. Steve hovered with the carving knife, Terry with the rouge homme - and with 235 guests (plus 20 odd standing) duly registered and seated, service began.

The menu was in landscape format, and of modest colourings. A fine script noted the thirty dishes on offer, and the various temptations that needed a decision. Many were familiar with the head chef's tastes, and were not suprised to see white meat and white chocolate once again on offer (JO had been seen in kitchen with an old recipe from 2007, and thought he would reprise a few of the dishes with a fresher garnish, and a sweeter syrup). So, how did it look? How did it taste?

With the old Nestle chocolate factory site providing a Sprint O setting in the middle of the dish, diners noted the peppering of sweet meats thereabouts, and also the spread of other controls - spaced as though water droplets from a colander - with general approval. Those that had been following Steve's 'Twenty Minute Meal' recipes, liked most of the entrees - especially the fresh blue cod on offer at #13 and the BBQ quail at #17 - but were unimpressed by #19 (park seat pie) - and completely avoided #15 (road junction pizza). Of the appetisers, numbers 5 and 9 were intended for the younger diners, and therefore found little favour with the tip men. The road junction dip at #2 also found few takers (the elderly runner that ran 12-2 thinking he was running 12-20(!!) notwithstanding). Perhaps the nibble that really caught the eye was the fig gelato at #7, a great dish - and a great view!

Moving to the mains, diners seemed to want the lot - and in scenes reminiscent of 'Le Grande Bouff', piled into them big time. The north western trio (22,24,23) were must haves, 21 likewise - as were the delicious pepper steak numbers in the apartment complex. For runners interested in the history here, #26 'footbridge flan' (Nestles) made a nice accompaniment, and contrast, to #27 'top side steak stair' (BHP Wire Works).  In addition to the eight 'must have' mains, broiled park seat (#25) and sliced and pickled 'stair bottom' (28) provided the outliers for those with stomach stapling in mind, or who had bought the doggy bag. It was going to be a night of high scoring - and loud burping.

Looking at the spread of pots and points, there were good circles to be had, with decisions needed in how to chew 16,21,8,11 into an otherwise steady meal. The apartment courses were on all plates, with #29 being the outpost and turn back point for most, and with the lower group (25,1,6,12,3,2) being an easy drop if you had taken too long over the other dishes. This gave you 410 points - interestingly our most common collect with 13 diners. The next two biggest groupings were twelve diners each for 480/490 points, and obviously a result of adding the southern 80/90 points mentioned above (the fresh greens in garlic butter at #12 being a distinctive part of this fuller tummy experience).

Most runners seemed to begin with #22 and the describe a clockwise route - some 24-10-23, some 24-8-23, others still working in #16 early. Being a contrary soul, Pork Pie likes to dine alone, and seemingly running against the tide, began 16,17,1,25 to collect along the lower menu pages, before swooping through the apartments and allowing a feast of points on the run home. In this case 18,21,11,13,23,10,24,22 - but getting back early, seemingly outrunning the similar 2007 loop by several minutes. Sometimes it pays to check the watch - even if this is rude at table.

Everyone loved the Nestles site material, and are thrilled that this area will be remapped at sprint O standard for one of the Monday series. Lots of good flowing reported, but also great discombobulation. Heiko was slowed by the many dishes hereabouts, and had trouble finding the gents after a gravy spill from the 'stair stew' at #29. His IM rivals greatly appreciated his difficulty in the crowded restaurant though, as did other sprint O stars, working well at the 1:10,000 mapping while others had difficulty with the paths (especially at #18) and roads. The stair up to #27 was another classy delivery from Mr Oliver and his mystery meals.

So, in summary, a great menu and great fun. Fish and meat courses, nibbles, crusty pies, Chicken Kiev - and of course the fig and dark chocolate souffle. To run the Sydney Summer Series is to anticipate dinner afterwards (yes, The Birkenhead did deliver) with a light Rose in reward, and the tingle of reward after a great flog. Last night chef Steve delivered dinner during the event. The double whammy!

OK folks, let's put the Blue Nun aside while we check on the scoring.

As you have seen/will see, the head chef delivered throughout the scoring range, with three punters carrying their bats (in a wonderful mixed moment of cricket and feeding). Unlike last weeks great Balmain Basket weaving wonder, scoring was more concentrated - with many enjoying the same dishes as their dining companions (I have noted the bigger groups above). Another factor that also takes the Maitre D's attention is the number of early returns - none more so than Stacey 'Went' West, returning from her post main course nap in 29 minutes. There were also several mid 30's, and Pie Chops has already mentioned his own early to be routine. In contrast, the overtime's were less, with Ian McKenzie walking the 600 in 87.13, and taking the LOC Award (I'm discounting Gails 101.42, because she forgot to clear and check!).

Before we get to some class timings, I always like to see who has copped the cruelest of finishing beeps - and none are as bad as Mal 'Countersigned' Gledhill's 49.01 with the one second denying him the outright win in IM. Well, he and 'Tearaway' both get the ton, so no probs I guess. Good running from these 410 pointers, and good to see TT in top running form again. Other one overs include Tim Austin '7' and Keith 'President Putin' Povah (46.01/47.01 both MM's) and Vet Mark Robinson (a lengthier time spent on his main - at 51.01). We also have a few very relieved 'on the minute' finishers - with Wayne 'Sergeant' Pepper the happiest at 45.00 exactly. Wayne is our course setter next week, so good that he didn't end his hen & chicken dinner last night in a fug - and thinking 'revenge'!! Kenny 'The John' Schaefer and 'The Hawke' flatlined on 46.00 - a minute over, but still enough (in Neil's case) to deliver a Winning Post Port for his troubles. Mr James would most likely have rather he 'ported' before he ran and gone one under the allotted.

So, who cleaned their plates then? In a break with recent tradition, correspondent Rosscoe from Moscow (aka Pork Pie) thought he would look beyond the evenings podium, and probe those that didn't quite. The 'pipped at the posts', the 'downtrodden and overlooked', the 'poor', the 'lame'..."give me your poor..." I think I'm straying to something American here. "Straighten up lad, what on earth are you on about"!!

Sadly, saluting some of the lower orders is difficult in several classes. For instance in SJW we only had 'The Shunter' (350) and Ellen 'Rogan Josh' Currie (260) on the paddock - no 4th place getters there. Likewise in SJM, where, although we had four at table in suitable bibs, a tie for first (Dunk & Adam - 490's!!), with 'Little Sir' Hugh at 460 and Alex K on 420 rounding out the entries, no 4th again. The Juniors are even more thinly represented in the also ran stakes - with only one/two's to report Matty/Jay and Bethany/Natalie). Our lady legends are similarly of rare pedigree, and much in demand when setting high table. Bryony, MJ, Sue and Janet all enjoying the cakes and fruits of Jamie Oliver's labours - and Kate Grenville's excellent production at STC.

Age classes that do have depth are often ones that only have a (vanilla) wafer between talents. Our Open's for example. After the two Andy's and Mark have left their mark, we salute Patrik 'The Gunboat' Gunnerson (4th with 570) holding off Tommy 'Gun' Joss (5th/560) and a couple of big eaters in 6th equal with 550's (James McQuillan/Michael 'The Four Turn Technique' Weiner). Anthony 'Terry' Dowle, one back (540) in 7th place, was ticked off for wearing his 70's headgear at the table, and will be keen not to upset the judges next week. In the OW's (after sensational stuff from Gill, Lisa and Clare), we saw a tie for 4th with Catherine Murphy and Clare Williams running up 510's. One back with a great run is sister Clare (Murphy), only ten off Catherine 'Parr' and hoping the national O selectors (Henry the 8th et al) will listen up. Great run Clare. Silvia 'Chairman' Teoh takes 6th on 470pts with Amy Harmer a place back with 450. Excellent and selective dining from our Open's.

The Masters also yield packed tables, with tight finishing in the blokes and m'ladies. Apart from Glenn, Richard (best on night with 600 in 42.19), Kar-Soon etc, we very clean plates further down. How about Martin 'Jerry Lee Lewis' Cousins and Pete 'The Yorkshire Dales' Fallows =4th with 520pts, a quartet of runners in =5th and 510pts (Anthony P, Kenny Schaefer, Ross Morrison, Sandy 'Shoe' Smith), and a trio on 500pts - and equal 6th (Wayne, Eric and Laurent 'The Pillow' Billot). David 'The Head' Kricker put the boot in, but ended ten back on 490 - and gets the washing up to do. In MW, Maree 'The Afgan' Bunney and Lisa 'First Stop' Linssen put up 440's to hold 4th from Emmanuelle Convert 'Able' and 'The Real' Julia Clemments (5th= on 400pts) and a triplet of madam's in 6th place (380's) - Lynda Calder, Kirstan Lamont, Louise 'Cat Stevens' Tiller. Feliz Bensan '& Hedges' lights up 7th place with her 290pt post, while casting an eye back at Rachael (510), Antoniya (500) and the 480 girls - and wondering if it was the uncooked mullet tail at #13 that slowed her. Next week Feliz, next week.

Liking what's on the table? Maybe a bit of Vet pie.

I'm noting Graeme McLeod taking 4th with 520, ten on from Mark 'In Irons' Savery and Andy Graham (5th=), and a tie in 6th (Ian 'I Believe in the Market' Clitheroe, Mike Ridley-Smith - 500pts). Jamie Kennedy finished the soup in 7th (490) with Matt 'Mort Bay' Peters working the long sox and after dinner mints for 480 and a tidy 8th on the order of service. Tania Kennedy reprises her run last week with an excellent 4th in VW (420) behind Carolyn, Paula and Sharon. Jan 'By The' Seeho was untroubled in 5th (410, same as her son Jay), enjoying the sea breeze, while Airdrie carded 390 for 6th and Sue Froude worked a tougher pork chop for 360 pts and 7th place. The SV's saw Karin polish the trophy (460), well clear of Kerry Emslie/Helen Murphy (=4th with 380's) and Penny 'The Haystack' Field (5th 270). At the mens table, Wazza is getting back to form with a 4th= run with Ron 'The Banana' Garner (470pts apiece), with a trio in 5th ten back (Lummo, Ian 'Of Cronulla' and 'The Art School'), and David Bowerman making the journey from Green Point to the Abbotsford Arms worthwhile with 450 points and 6th placing. Julian and Martin 'Ned Kelly' Mansfield kept their revolvers from view, gobbling their hen pie with 430 peas in smart time.

Going to the top table we see Legends Ken 'Of Epping' (410), Ernest (400), Dave (370) and Ron (360) fall in behind Rosscoe, 'The Pants' and a nice pudding (with prunes) from Ian Miller (3rd with 420). Tim Cox enjoyed an unusual white chocolate topped muffin for his 2nd in IM, as Brian, Lloyd and Heiko went equal 3rd, and Bruce Stanley (4th, 310pts) tipped the pith helmut at the head waiter (and was duly evicted) was well clear of Bruce Abrahams 250 5th placing. Rounding off as the staff began to clear plates, we see walkers Mel run away with 420 from Jim and Chris (410) a century on from Andy Povah, Matty Morgan (300 in 4th) and Ian's 170. Michelle, Kerryn and Ruth placed in the WaW stakes, with Lelsey, Julie and Alison having to watch - and wait! Not much in this girls!

Finally, a nice report from checkpoint #9. Apparently a family had set up a picnic there, covering the table, and the control with blanket tablecloth. Approaching beepsters found the control by lifting the cloth! The friendly group asked our correspondent to join them. Nice one.

PP is struggling with updated computer and keeps losing this blog, and then finding it again! Fearing this treatise on Sydney's dining habits, and other things gastronomic, might go awol - he roars to the final hurdle. And gives thanks to Steve and the Bennelong crew for such an enjoyable dinner. Great fun, great run - and a full tummy! Very satisfying indeed.

Now to next week, and a return to Penno! This promises to be a sensational, and different SSS experience. We haven't been to Pennant Hills Park for a Summer Series outing for well over 10/12 years, so there is much anticipation in the air. Setter Wayne and the BN crew (again!!) are sure to give us a bit of bush track thinking as we dash beyond the netball and tennis courts. Maybe even some off track stuff?? This was an early Sydney orienteering map, well revised over the years, and always one to offer some excellent navigational challenges. The Pork is already losing hair at the thought of it. Join us as the SSS caravan rolls on - up north this time, and in complete contrast to the last two harbour side symphonies. For those craving a more bushy SSS experience - this is your moment.

WHAT? A PLANE? A BIRD? A FLYING PIG?
HOLD EVERYTHING SPORTS-FANS, 'PORK PIE' HAS RETURNED TO THE CHAIR, A CIGAR AND RESCHS IN HAND. HE MOVES THE FINGER TO EVENT 17 ON THE SSS PROGRAMME ("SNAILS BAY"), AND ANNOUNCES THE RESUMPTION OF NORMAL SERVICE.

'ANYTHING BUT AT SNAILS AS DR. DOCTORS WITH DAWN'

In a huge roll up last night at Balmain, Dr Matt Peters posed a new interpretation of doing laps in the Dawn Fraser Pool. Instead of going up and back, up and back, the good Doc had more circumferential things in mind - going round in circles!

And go round we did. In a grand sweep of this fascinating peninsular suburb we began at Mort, ignored the Snail, shoveled on coal at the Balmain Power Station, swam between the flags, studied 'Pioneer' tied up at White Bay, and marveled at the steam hammer. What a night, what a course, what a dinner afterwards at the 'Dry Dock'.

Lets have a decko at the whole shebang, and look beneath the skirts of this intriguing piece of course setting and the night that saw attendance records smashed - much as they were here last season (257 entries with at least another 25-30 in the group category. Well over 280 nags on the nibble).

First up is the great assembly location - further west of last years biggie, and the better for it. The UR crew were in full branded plumage with humour to the fore at check in (weigh in sounds better). The Banjo lands a portrait sheet with a choice of clue description sizes. A cool evening added to the anticipation, as the string men retired to the Camry to consider the unusual 1:8000 scale - and the centrifugal factor at work in Matt's mind. Punters used to the duck and weave of recent Summer Series offerings, where startled to discover the Doctor had deployed the noose - a complete ring of controls with very little in the middle. If this was a triple hanging at the OK Corral, the rope would need some tightening to deal with prisoners 14,7 and 10 - standing alone and trembling in the middle of the wagon (Pork Pie thinks he hears John Wayne, but snaps awake.....).

The course looked to be one of the smoothest circles yet seen in SSS racing, but did come with a nod to the puff-o-meter (the stairs on Dawn's western flank). All looked very connective however, with an easy to like beginning in the anti-clockwise direction that led one further and further on before confronting a barren return for the medium fitties, or a full circle to the east for the guns and some high scoring. This was seductive setting from Matt, drawing runners ever deeper into a web in the west, and then demanding commitment and a touch or daring to go fully east.

Most ponies jumped from the barrier and headed for #29, working the steam hammer and pool points, before plunging on to the old power station site. Some great control sites on the way in this magic part of Sydney (views from #15 and 24, the superb rotunda at #26, the pump house at 22 and yet more visuals at 21). Top stuff, and points well earned with the steps up and down at 15-4. You either then worked 11,23,25,16 and White Bay, or took a job on less pay via 1,14,7 and 9. Both had their fans, and both rewarding runners with the fascinating surroundings - if not the points.

Another option, and one adopted by 'The King' and the Pork Chop (in a 'brush with fame' moment), was to work east first via #19. Ignoring the hill climb to #10 gave a lower level route to #20 (connecting the streets here needed careful map contact) and a good linkage across the bottom the map to the western fun. The advantage of going clockwise was it gave you lots of point options in the closing stages - unlike those going 'anti'. Many looked at the spread of olive green, the low rewards in the centre, and just said 'bugger it, lets catch the Circle Line'!

I'd say most pots got some action, with possibly #10 being the least visited. There were problems at #5, with the small gap shown n/w not passable. James Lithgow lost time here, intending to run 27-5-6, and madly running south to only get 27-6 - and losing valuable time (not sure why 'The Tractor' didn't back up from the blocked route and loop in from the north??). Another classic to report - the local who complained about the noise of runners using the stairs adjacent to her house at #17! Matt has copped some weird ones over the years, but noisy stairs! Hard to believe.

Let's have a look at some of the scoring - and report an unusual aspect of the evening - the almost complete recording of all possible scores, with only 140 points unloved, and only one wet nurse ministering to #480. Also unusual to see the most popular score (with 12 competitors on the lick) at 510 points - very much higher points than the normal 300's bunching. Eleven runners posted 270 to be the next biggest group, with all other scores getting fewer adherents. This gives the lie to Porkies initial impression - that huge number would end up with the same score (29-21 and back). Good setting Dr Matt.

Claiming the yellow singlet, Richard Green swept the course in 42.34 to hold the 100 from fellow MM's Tim 'Bucktoo' Austin (running in desert fatigues) and Neil 'I've Got A' Lefevre (570's), and Kar-Soon's close 560. Going down the age escalator (something Mr Pie would rather like to do), we see OM star Andy 'Murray' Hill working across court for 600 in 44.46 to take the lollies from Mark Schaefer (590), and Jeremy Fowler/Andy Brown - home in 70's brown suede with 560 apiece. Even further down, we see an exceptional run from Sub Junior Adam Halmy (560 pts) taking the candle from Aidan (520 after the cruelest of one second penalties) and a great run from Hugh 'Grant' Petterson with 510 on the chalk board and a movie offer in the wings. Balmain local, 'The Watering Can', put on 490 in the same category.

The juniors didn't quite match 'The Ham', with Will Kennedy piling on 540 to lead Bjorn 'Borg' Lindqvist and 'The Mattress' by thirty. The girls were also on the fly with Amanda 'Home & Away' Holmgren screen testing 490 points, to shade Adam's sister Bethany (410 and wearing the silver sash). Sadly, there were no SJW's to report, so we now go back up the age ladders - to record yet another fantastic finish from OW star, Gill Fowler - home in exactly 45 minutes (!!) for a sensational 590 points.  Catherine Murphy took silver with 560, shading Lisa 'Sprint The Bays' Grant (540) and Claire 'Big W' Winneck (530 for the Shoppers Friend).

MW racing gets the Members Stand excited, with last night's betting plunge on Rachael 'The River' Povah paying off big time. Rach posted 520 to be well clear of earlier favourite Carolyn Haupt (450), in turn well clear of 'Tracing Paper' on 420 and Kirstan Lamont 'Blanc' (410 points and covered in snow). The vets turned up a tie in the blokes (Greg and Michael - 570's for equal firsts) and in the mares (Marie 'The Washing Machine' Ringer and Caroline 'Rod's On The' Davies - 380's for equal seconds). Paula, not lost on the Tongariro Track, piled on the VW win with 420, and PP notes Tania Kennedy running into bronze with 360. Good scoring from The Marquess of Queensbury Rules.

The Supers had well credentialed winners - Karin (380) from Debs (370) and Dale (320) in the SVW's, and Mel running on from James by ten in the SVM (510/500). Ian 'The Turin' Froude shared third (and the holy water) with Neil Hawthorne (490's) - after Neil, in an effort to shake the Beecroft Bandit, added #1 on the 25-23 squirt (JL going straight), but went over time and forgot to ping #29 on the run in! In the elderly ward, Rosscoe managed a tenner over the Pants in LM (no Steve Flick last night), with Tezza back on 380 - and wishing for more bush. Bryony took another win with 270 over Toni Frank (Sinatra) from BOW club in Perth - sharing the spotlight and the stage with MJ (210's apiece). Finally, Heiko flew for 450 and a win in the Immortals, with Janet claiming likewise, but with a more dignified 240 (claiming from Sue with 210). Brian 'The Bus' Cleland and Mal Gledhill worked the curbside lanes to be back in the depot with 340's - well off The Kincumber Kid's classy total, but a tenner on from Tim Cox.

The walkers were as per programme, with Chris holding Jimmy 'Page' Merchant at bay (350/310), and Michelle doing the same to Wendy (340/270). Something not right about our vet star (and recent open challenger) walking like this. Fans of 'The Bendy Bus' hope injuries will soon ameliorate and we can once more marvel at her extraordinary speed. Ruth 'The Prime Minister of New Zealand' Jacka is also note in the WaW's - with 220 points, and a message to the Queen about butter exports.

Some other stats to fire up the eyelids.

How about some great timing stories. This outing saw six (!) perfect pings, with Rochelle 'Chocolate Box' Cox, Heiko, Bethany, Gill, Tim 'Two Seconds John, Two Seconds' Cox, and Christine 'The Running Shoe' Walsh all home exactly on the minute (no seconds). In the close shaves department, how about a cheer for Martin 'Two Art Schools In The One Name' Slade and Andy 'I Believe' Graham, both carding 44.59! Connie and Ruth Jacka both managed a second more to spare - with 44.58's. Phew! In the groaning penalty corner, Hamish McDonald threw the kilt at the finish banner after carding a plus one second (43.01), and Mike 'Legs' Ward also suffered from his pit stop at 'The London' half way round - finishing in two over (45.02). Cruelty indeed.

Great to see such a roll up. It appears to be a truism with the Summer Series, the worse the parking, the bigger the crowd. Actually, not too bad last night, but I reflect on many other tight ones - Lavendar Bay, Kirribilli etc. Some other random attendees to note. The Russian Ballerina, Antoniya Bachvarova, with a perfect 500 (MW), Dan 'Brown' Bunting, agreeing to an all time record advance for 'The Pork Pie Papers' (400 million), Digby 'The Gardeners Friend' Pritchard, working 300 litres of complete lawn food in VM, Emily and Lucia taking turns with the E stick, and posting 200 Vatican postcards - and Gail 'The Chairman' Barr walking with purpose to the board meeting, 100 points in the briefcase. Great scoring amongst a host of others of course - including our all time record 'over'. How about a round of applause for Rodolfo 'The Cactus' Gonzales scoring minus 920 points after a 161 minute outing! Rodolfo's 250 points and 1170 point penalty are destined for the record books, and well shade Ian McKenzie's all point walk in 92.55 minutes (600 - 480 for 120). Ian, your just not trying!

OK, enough of this, the blogsters must be itching to add comments (something Porkie was somewhat sad to see didn't happen after early january entreaties). A great night with an amazing spread of scoring. Matt's deception worked a treat it seems, and maybe had something to do with his recent London City Chase participation - and take on things 'cunning running'. A top spot, and a map large enough to keep rotating - and maybe get to Snails Bay next season.

Looking forward, we remain in harbour contact with Steve Flick's Abbotsford next week. Steve returns to the initial assembly location at the Quarantine Station buildings, giving us great harbour-side running options with views galore. This is a relatively flattie, so should see some fast time amongst the flash Harry's. Steve is in excellent running form himself, so expect no quarter from the Legend - or any left over chicken. Make it a date.

Looking even further forward, I note the change of venue for round 20 at Vineyard Creek. We are now beginning at Homelands Reserve, Homelands Avenue, Telopea - not at Rock Farm Reserve as advertised.

Finally (Porkie is exhausted and in need of a White Rabbit Dark), I'd like to remind all summer series fans, followers, flogsters and friends, that the series is completely bought about by volunteers. There have been one or two recent incidents of abuse to course setters that really go beyond the pale. Please always reserve any negative comments you may have till after you have cooled down - and then maybe (if you have to) mention them to the organisers, to me, or ONSW Technical Director Andrew Lumsden. And it never hurts to let the course setter know they have done a great job - no matter how hard or easy the course. The magic of the Sydney Summer Series is the great texture we get from a variety of venues - and a variety of course setters. Long may the mix and the madness continue!


  

KISSING THE BUSHRANGER AT THE INCINERATOR

Like many other orienteering and SSS fanatics, correspondent 'Pork Pie' will be away in New Zealand immediately after Dave's 'burn' at The Incinerator this Wednesday - running (staggering more like it Pie Face) in the Oceania O Carnival. Given his race calls are usually made close to trackside, the old punter will need to lay the pencil and binoculars aside while he battles the All Blacks, and hope others can report for him. So, to facilitate correspondence about the next three events, SSS bloggers are invited to add reports and comments directly beneath (this Reschs stained note from the furlong post). I look forward to hearing about three great events as the 22nd SSS legs it well and truly into 2013. Porkie will be back inside the Tuza at Dr Matt's Birchgrove Snail fry up.

QUEENS GET SAUCE ON THEIR CHIPS AT CLIFF

Ian 'The Sauce Bottle' Jessup looks to have crafted one of the best outings in the Summer Series so far with an excellent and even spread along the sands and suburban sunbake of Queenscliff, Freshie and Curl Curl last Wednesday - Boxing Day, and our first adventure out of doors when the rest of the country is on the bean bag watching Dennis Lillee (errr, no), Pup going at it with a straight drive.

Correspondent Pork Pie was absent in bleak city (yes, on the BB), so I'm working from feedback from the SSS spy network - BUT, I think a few small twirls of the 2B might be in order.

Firstly, a very good roll up considering the day, and the many fans that might have headed off to the Christmas 5 Days orienteering in Victoria. With 148 entries, and another 15 or so in Group Think mode, we get a very tidy 160-165 ponies nervously eyeing their trainers to see if it's a full submersion in the salty stuff, or just a sniff. Apparently there also was a wind factor, although one can't imagine this would be anything like what might happen to the World Cup O crowd in Wellington shortly - battling the Southerly as they run 'Mr Speaker'!

We seem to have had depth in most fields, although no JM's, and only Bryony being Legendary. Nevertheless, some good contests/results are apparent, with Glenn a full bladder in 43.30 looking like our only stallion on 600 points. Steve Ryan fell ten short in OM, 'Green King Ale' a further ten in MM, with Vets 'Handy' Andy Simpson and Tim 'Bob' Rogers sharing 540's to pip 'The Paddlepop Stick' by 10. Malcolm might have been on dry tyres and got too close to the wet at #29. Lisa Grant was our only woman 500 pointer, working up her pace for another attack on the winning jersey at Sprint The Bays.

Good to see Mike Halmy's children on the burst, with Adam flying in the Subs with a sensational 540, and Bethany only missing the gold coin by ten in JW (390/400 to Sweden's Annie Forsberg - on her way to the World Cup no doubt). Paula pulled on the right stockings for a 420 kill in VW, Karin well clear in SVW, Martin 'The' Slade 'School Of Art' worked the pigments a tough too roughly in SVM, just missing a spot in the corner of the canvass to go 440 to 'The Hawk's' 450 in SVM. Heiko looks to have returned to winning form in the Immortals (Sue also), with Jimmy holding ten over 'The Cheese' in the WaM - and winning like his grand daughter Blyss did in the SJW's. Michelle and Wendy called a truce in WaW, both carding 300's and then retiring for a Pimms at Harboard Diggers.

According to 'Mr Statts'. 90% of runners began via #6 or #7. Not suprising really, but how about the competitor who began with control #5! You can almost hear Will Anderson saying...."The Sydney Summer Series, the perfect way to stand out from the crowd". A cracker.

Runners have reported on the 'sucked in' nature of the setting, with 'The Bottle' egging you on (mmm, something about ketchup on the eggs here - if only I can find it), especially to the north, with points seemingly within reach. Just another one, just another bagger. The rich pickings across the northern arc are just perfect in this regard - with an outer loop almost on the level working, but the nice higher earners (16,28,8,30,14) needing a touch of the puff-o-meter, and demanding a sort of sea gull like swooping and diving approach. Perfect for this beach setting!

The south looks a cruel claim, with Ian putting 100 points over at the Queen - and another 30 on top. A very tough ask here I would have thought - especially if it was hot (PP not sure of the weather). Still, a nice loop (24,12,1,21,11,2,22,3,23) that popped 190 chips into yesterdays Herald. Add the salt at #25 along Freshwater Beach, and you were on a winner. I see lots of good looping, a feature of Ian's setting, with hardly a lonely beep station. Maybe #8??

Anyway, I'm looking on rather enviously at what must have been a top event. As you would expect from the Mayor of Manly. So, well done Jesso, and the GO crew. And cheers to all who braved the urgings of country aunties - and went for a run instead of taking another slice of Madeira. The 'Rusted On' Award to each and every one.

Now, next Wednesday sees Dave Stitt in charge at the excellent Incinerator in Willoughby. This Burley Griffin marvel provides an architectural anchor to a very enjoyable area for Summer Series funsters to have one more flog of the fetlocks before boarding QF47 and the dash to the Oceania Challenge/World Cup Orienteering Carnival in New Zealand. Dave enjoys a wide scatter and will no doubt go east for a touch of bush track, west for a bit of wrist spin, south to count cars on the overpass footbridge - and a even might get us a discount at the Bang & Olufsen store. Plenty of parking and a great childrens play area add to the flavour as we bang it on for the second half - and experience the deep thinking of the long standing Garingal Secretary. Join us!

Finally. Because of impending absence in NZ, 'Party Pie Face' will blog briefly next week with a paragraph or so that can be used as a catalyst for race reports of events at Killara and Putney, and also 'The Incinerator' (I won't have time, although I'll be there). Until then sports fans, back to the Baenie with a Reschs in hand.  

BALMORAL TRAM - MORE THE 'RACK' THAN THE 'TOASTRACK'

On a night with our lowest ever winning scores, our largest ever number of runners with scores below 100 - and where 80% of competitors scored on or below the half way mark, we have something to think about. Pork Pie leans forward, licks the pencil and scratches his head - it looks like a long night at the Stewards inquiry.

Another toughie, probably our toughest of all time, and capping off a trio of long flogs that is making old cunning runners wonder if they have woken up in some sort of Sydney Striders nightmare. Lets have a little look behind last nights goings on as Sydney Tramways brings us the Balmoral Line, and a nice day out at the beach.

Chief Motorman from the Bennelong Shed, Gordon 'The Track Grinding Car' Wilson (not Driver Bluett as per original timetable), had been predicted, by none other than 'The Pie Shop' himself, to be casting the thirty knucklebones in a wide scatter - and invoking his occasional dining partner, Contour Kate, in his plans. Little did the 204 trusting passengers anticipate how wide he would go, how very wide, or how much Kate would figure. Little did the crowd aboard the O and K class cars (the Toastrack Trams of the Sydney Network) imagine that 'The Grinder' would demand so much from their $10 excursion fares.

But a demand it was, and one of the biggest calls over many years of summer fun with the Aunties at beautiful Balmoral. Let's start at the Suakin Drive Depot and examine the network, the cars and their crews.

Firstly, nice to be at this well presented depot with good parking and not the meters of 'below stairs'. The BNO bunting acknowledged their recent winning of the regional NSW tram depot garden competition, and welcomed runners to the ticket office. Slipping in the ten bob note resulted in an A4 sized colour ticket in portrait format - with magenta the circles requiring an Ian Thorpe foot to cover them. Mmmmm, this looks a worry, mused excursionists as they boarded O class #1278.

Looking closer, the map had two close in clusters (one with a sting in the tail), and an elongated leg warmer to the north. There was a little beach action, a touch of tramline, and a property perve loop for those that didn't want to get wet feet. Much puzzlement and string twirling, saw bathers reluctant to join the departing car, hoping there would be another one along in a minute when their thoughts had settled. Secretly, they were holding off the 5.32 O class service, hoping that the 5.48 might be a later model R class car with the more comfortable seats. Alas, it wasn't to be.

How to begin? How to end? The western claim (9,12,7,27) was one obvious starting point, and gave a nice 'high line' link to #30 and points further north. The eighty points immediately south/east also had fans, with #10 giving a nice line to the drop via 22. The attraction with this beginning were the views - magnificent at #13 and very enjoyable along the 13-10 track. The sting was #21, a beautiful bit of setting that had you working for the three tenners (Luciano etc, etc). I note that Larry, in his excellent on-time 330, worked a 5,13,6,9 beginning - ignoring the temptress at W Path.

So a beginning in two parts. How to add was the next puzzle. Accepted advice from old trammies at Balmoral, is to avoid climbing more than once if it can be avoided, and this figured as passengers puzzled over their routes. If dropping from either the west start or the east start, swapped returns worked, but ignored the clutch of points in the conductors money bag - and those further north. We have often seen a biggie on the creek line below #8 giving the shove a broken down tram needs in these parts - but not last night. 'The Grinder' poked a ten on a 'bridge too far', dropped the creek from his thinking, instead focussing on the tramline formation, where a 14/29 claim saw competitors rise at about the same speed as their beachgoing relatives did in the 1950's. The other devil here was #19 - one for the half way down Harry's maybe, but not worth the effort if you were flogging home before the Mr Whippy van left the Suakin Depot.

With 'only' 170 points available up top (and I'm including car #21), runners needed more chips on their buttie. As it turns out, many heeded the Motormans mantra, and worked north from 30 to pencil 24,17,28 before turning the trolley pole, and home via 3,15,16 and around to 29,8. Others, with a less strict travelling inspector on board, collected #17 and then looped north to add 25 and 18 before reversing the car. There is a confusing gaggle of streets and tramway points around 3,15,16, with several trips taking wrong tracks here. Onesuch was Dan 'The Stationmaster' Redfern, rising from #3 (after punting an in/out to 15 and feeling it) to 16, but counting the wrong number of streets, and ending  up on a straight track instead of claiming at the twenty point bend. This whole part of the map is where passengers kidded themselves that they had avoided the main climb, but the puff-o-meter knows otherwise! Especially those that liked the 15,14,29 link - but twigged on the bridge in the park below the fence corner (and above the rabbits?!) that they were at the very bottom, and it was upsey, upsey with traction motors screaming as the driver had the old girl working in full series.

Other routes of interest were Mal 'The Indian' Bradley (370 VM) doing a full outer circle, leaving off the middle and south, and confining his Balmoral Burn leg close to the run of the same name. Mark Schaefer went high north, dropped to 26,4 and then pressed home via the middle for his 400 net, while Paula began 1,13,10,22 and ran the beach before a 26-25 flog (not tempted by #18) got her height and a passing Athol Wharf tram home. Although 100 points over, Miss Finland looks to again be our VW winner.

If staying close to home, the top 170 points was most commonly augmented by a drop along the old tram route (29,14), sand in the volleys at 23, and taking the steps up to 22 for a potential 280 pointer.  This was hard work, and still well short of halfway on the staff roster! 'The Blue Engine' was having his way with you, and you had no answer!

I don't think many would have bought the ten cents ticket to #1, and so honorably award this last nights 'lonely pot'. Everything else heard the dong of the tramcar gong, even if heavy traffic and slow work on the uphill line meant time penalties - and a please explain from the 'on-time running' superintendent.

So how did the excursionists fare at this toughie from 'The Track Grinder'? Suffice to say, most age category winners were as per programme, with perhaps the standout win on the night being Mel 'Ting Moment' Cox with a simply sensational 360pt toppie in the super vets. Lazzo, despite his excellent planning, was still thirty in arrears here, and had to stand on the way home. We are also seeing some of the overseas orienteering competitors on their way to the Christmas 5 Days and the NZ World Cup in town - with Sweden's Lina Andersson (SJW) and the 'Get Your Guns' duo of Annie and Anna (JW's), claiming the points in this nice down under warm up (and transport history lesson). I should also mention 'Tearaway' Ted Mulherin working his horse tram to victory in the Immortals. Malcolm's 240 (to Ted's 270) gives him a good 2nd here, with Heiko overcooking the powerstation, and causing his tram to work back to the depot in first notch (a 58.28 outing not popular with his Central Coast passengers).

Other items of interest. Glenn working an all stops car in 65.59 (close) for 390, one of only two cars to work the full Balmoral route (the other car being driven by Motorman Coady, ably assisted by Conductor Parker, who also get the Government Transport Award for longest on course - their R1 class tram being out of the depot for 85.36 minutes!).

In the always interesting 'just made it' category', Sue Thomson (IW 200pts) punched the depot bundy clock in exactly 45.00!! and takes out first prize. The one second unders followed, with Brian 'The Brain' Brannigan (VM 330) and Jason 'The Scissors' Gleadhill (MM 240) the purest at 44.59 apiece, and Glenny, Jimmy Forbes, Carolyn, Stu Deane, Martin Mansfield and Keryn Hassall all carding a .59 and thanking the responsiveness of their trams to the white departure light at the Gearges Heights stub terminus. In the dreaded 'just over' group (five victims), 'The Atom' and 'The Mattrass' both pinged in a cruel 46.01, Kenny went one under in 44.01 with Ian 'The Turin' Froude (53.01) and Sindy, Celine, Matt and the Empress Josephine missing the beheading at 47.01. Cruel timing, and a likely rebute from the fat controller.

Our most popular score was 250 points, with 15 runners going this route. Among them, Chris 'The Beanstalk' Jacka (OM 90 over) and Antoniya 'The Ballerina' Bachvarova (MW 70 over) were the wider claims, whilst Peter De Lissa 'Pork Pie Makes Of This The Better' (OM) and Ian 'Bedside Manner' Cameron (SVM) both put their controllers in the neutral position with seconds to spare - recording no penalty in this clubby and age varied class.

As The Pork Chop always says, there are many more stories to be told about the night and scores to be revealed. "Soon my lovelies, soon", all will be on the SSS web site. In rounding off then, there is no getting around the fact that we had a very tough ask last night. in one of our greatest locations. Gordy took to us with the point lever, and bludgeoned the passengers into lower scores than most anticipated - or liked. Despite the low totals, much about the setting was excellent in route option terms, in orienteering terms, with very difficult decisions being mulled over, and often modified on route. I think we might have had a revolution if it had been a simple loopy excursion over this length/width, but that, thankfully, wasn't the case with lots of (admittedly poorly paying) options. I'm hoping the course might invite comment - with all feedback to this blog most welcome. PP will reiterate guidelines to try and get back some semblance of scoring reason shortly (and notes a 'no problem' view with a tough biggie - as long as the majority of points are within a reasonable claim, and only go for a few outliers).

I always like to salute the organisers, so thanks to all the BNO crew, and to Gordy, Terry etc. A great roll up, excellent facilities, views, the beach - and some choice real estate to finger as we passed out (no, I mean by!).

So, to next week (yes, the SSS rolls on with Ian Jessup hosting #13 at Harboard on Boxing Day!). The important news here concerns the assembly area - moved from Freshwater Reserve at the beach to Jacka Park (cnr Oliver Street & Wyndora Avenue). Note there is a playground at Jacka, BUT NO TOILETS. Be prepared. And enjoy this classy beachside area that 'The Sauce Bottle' is bound to fully exploit. Also note the altered event timing, with starts available from 3.30pm (to 6pm), so everyone can get a swim in. Bring the cossie in this perfect way to run the body back together after too much Christmas pud.

Speaking of Christmas, correspondent Pork Pie and all the Summer Series crew, wish you all a very happy Christmas, and holiday break. Thanks for supporting the greatest cunning running programme in Aussie - which continues into the new year with Dave Stitt's incendiary outing at the Incinerator in Willoughby on January 2. All those NZ Oceania Challenge orienteers departing on QF47 on Thursday morning, this is your one last chance to flog the fetlocks in anticipation of running the Kiwi dunes - and the enigmatic map called "Mr Speaker". Should be a blast!

 

        

TOUGH DUCK AT THE BUTCHER

Michael 'Your Friendly Neighbourhood Butcher' Burton donned the blue course-setters apron and sharpened his knives, as he dressed the window display with prime cuts and choice offerings for Christmas. Michael, mostly known for his juicy steaks (and the 'GalaxyWurst' sausage), augmented the beef and lamb displays with a range of poultry - including that senior bird, the 'Coogee Duck'. For many buyers, eager for a bargain, the duck proved a tough bird. A very tough bird.

"Tell me more Pork Pie (hereafter old Duck Pie?)".

Arriving shoppers, parting the plastic fly curtain and ordering the Wednesday special, received a portrait wall chart indicating thirty common cuts. Somewhat resembling a slabby and untrimmed Porterhouse with a fatty middle, the spread looked reasonably within budget and thoughts strayed to higher quartile scoring - until the duck factor kicked in. A duck-in here, a duck-in there - ah ha, the Butcher was going to make you flap your wings to earn your points. It was to be an evening of 'Doing a Larry', ducking in and out to the many dead ends to pick up the meat.

So, looking at the course in more detail, we see the Butchers Block itself hosting several tough whacks with the cleaver (21,12,22,24), while the lamb loin chop pairing of 16 and 25, also needed well glued false teeth to chew and digest them. Further west, cleaner loops meant less 'duck-in' work was required, although checkpoints 19,20 and 30 all saw runners ping and reverse direction. The south western Butchers trio were pretty tough ducks - with the long flogs to water level at 21, 12 and 22, all rendering the returning uphill shoppers breathless putty in the hands of the Coogee maestro.

Given the threatening land owner, the linking path to Woodford Bay was rendered (boiled down if you will) out of bounds, making the fifty points at 16/25 an out and back flog of testing proportions. This 'duck-in/out' took the cake, and I suspect the stuffing, out of most who ventured here, but was probably the cut of steak most quickly discarded by runners on a more sensible budget. As noted above, twenty one looked the worst of the others, although #12 required a similar effort - and only gave you a twenty dollar hamper for your troubles.

In making a selection of the cuts (points) available, many liked the look of the Tambourine Bay shopping, and  especially the 26,27,30 collect that seemed an affordable add to the main Longueville offering. The bush tracks in the middle of the course are well and fondly remembered, and Michael included good scoring here for those that like a touch of eucalypt in their mint sauce. The wider loop west (19,9,29,28,18,27 - ignore #8), worked well for the guns, although they had to annoyingly duck-in/out to #30 in working their trip here (a brilliant bit of setting). The way out and back to the creek/west was either go 11,20,10,30,19 and a clockwise claim, or work up the peninsular (some after beeping the Blockies themselves), and run in at the north via 6 and 7 before booking 26,27 and an anti clockwise route.

If of any interest, correspondent 'Duck Pie', managed a win in LM with 360 points, and an 'anti' circuit that began in/out to 11, then 1,22,2, the Block to 4,15,5,17,6, the creek to 26,27 reverse engines, in/out 30,10 in/out 20 and flog home. In other observations, the 17-6 joint could be carved on either side, scrambling 26 to the road worked, the natural stone bridge at #10 gets the 'natural beauty' award (closely run by #7, the sewer manhole) - with a very difficult decision on the lonely pot. Number eight in the west was easily dropped from the wider claim as I have mentioned, but worked for the 27,8,29,9,19 runners. Maybe the dreaded #21? Maybe the pair in Woodford Bay (16,25)?? Mmmmm, much to cogitate on - especially if enjoying a sirloin with a nice Shiraz.

So, a wide course offering from our friendly butcher, but plenty of interest and choice. Not so spread as 'The Heavy Rollers' last week Epping epic (good correspondence after last weeks post), but a challenge all the same. 'The King' at the head table won the night, posting a final 550, after his full girth measurement of 590 inches was reduced by a 40 point vegetarian penalty. All hail to Richard for another magnificent run.

We see a couple of zero point totals on the Specials blackboard, and a sensational minus 230, at the other end of the dining table - and plenty of action in between. Now that we have given the event 11 meat tray a close inspection, lets pop the competitors on the barbie and see how they cook.

Our age class winners are (again) much as before, with fearsome competition in many categories. We have mentioned His Royal Highness, King Richard Green taking out the MM title with his 550pts - pipping Glenn's all stations 600 (-60) 540 in the same age category. The Open's saw ties in both classes, with OM stars 'The Pen' and 'The Hangman' both carding Glenny's 540 (Steve in early, Mark a 580 minus 40), and with Catherine and Gill both posting 490's in OW (this time Catherine in with a nicely timed 44.48 and 'I'm Not' working a 510 minus 20). In MW, Carolyn 'New' Haupt worked the City of Sails trollybus to a clear win with 400, holding off rival MW fancies Rachael and Mary by twenty.

Briefly in other winning postings (I'm suddenly thinking chocolate - weird in a butcher's shop), the Curries both won in SJ, 'The Underarm Ball' and Georgia took the J's, Pete Annetts and 'West African Slavery' tied in the vets (holding off 'The BSA' by 10) while 'The Blast Furnace' and Ross Emslie tied up a ton each in the SVM's (Neil interstate) with 390 apiece - both interestingly home in minus ten after 45.30 and 45.39 final beeps. Paula and Karin won various V's, the 'Pie' managed a rare win against 'One Flick & Their Gone' in LM (360/350, with 'The Pants' back on 330), and with Mary Jane going back for seconds in LW. 'Not' June Stanley had a full head of steam up to crash through in the Immortal Women, and Heiko suffered a rare loss in IM - going down by ten to Teddy and Mal.

Interestingly, Wendy Stevenson walked last night. Her 260 just shy of 'The Paving Stone's' 280, and giving her OW rivals a night off. The 'Bus' is keeping something in check for a bike event I gather. Jimmy walked with granddaughter Blyss (she posts an inaugural 140 in SJW), giving Wazza and Mel a kilo of mince in the WaM's  Also, in the stars on the bench stakes, Eoin 'The Rothbury Estate' Rothery, only at half speed in SVM with 260 points - or is that pints (of Merlot of course, the choice of meat men in the far west copper mines).

The Feet generated another excellent roll up at the Longueville Butchers Block, with 204 entries, and another 18/20 or so following mummies and 'partners' into the shop. Always a popular venue this BB. And one where our most popular score (260pts with 17 runners) was the same 'most popular' as the last time we were here!   Velly weird missus Pork. Actually, the 17 nags on 260pts only just made it, with 15 runners going sixty better in carding a trendy 320 - including mum-to-be Sue Davis, Miles 'The Trumpeter' Ellis and Garingal Master, Emmanuelle 'The Conservatorium' Convert (also on trumpet).

We again had runners from interstate (Melissa 'Terry' Thomas from Red Roos in the ACT (350 in OW - and no gap in her front teeth), and Clifford  'Mr D'arcy' Heath from Bayside Kangaroos in Melbourne (a smouldering 340 in VM), and what might be a prelude to the NZ Oceania Challenge in January - runners from Europe coming down under to begin their campaign, including Aran Lankow (OM), Sweden's Per Ivarsson (SVM) and Paivi Srppola in VW. Welcome all.

Our longest on course award goes once again to Ian 'The Incan Ruin' McKenzie, walking for 97.40 to collect all and a 70 point Guiness pie. 'Princess' Amelia and 'Prince' William weren't out quite so long (84.23) but managed to convert their 170 point lamb roast into a minus 230 point serving! No gravy for these two. While I'm on a theme here, Stephanie 'No Relation' Allen earned 320 but then lost 320 after refusing a police escort and taking the wrong tram home. Her zero post is a classic tale of selfless enjoyment - and the merits of crispy bacon.

We had two 'one second overs', with Andy Hill going 52.01 and the Bryan Merzeo 'Estonian Folk' Group doing likewise with a 42.01 outing (in flashy skirts). Tough stuff - like the Duck! A close shave worth another gnaw of the bone, is Paula 'The Saveloy' Savolainen - home in 44.59! How's that for timing, and not burning the Ozzo Bucco.

A couple of other scores to finish (before shop closing). We had four competitors that enjoyed The New York Cut (400pts), including Andy 'Randwick Racecource' Graham and 'The Ink Bottle'; eight that went for the Rump (300pts), including Gordon 'The Blue Engine' Wilson, 'The Vegie' (great to see Ronald out from under the Pinus Insignus), Ian 'Big Blue' Miller and (having jumped ship) Tania 'Park' Kennedy; three that ordered the Pork Chop (200pts), including tour driver Kerry Hass 'Pass'; and a singular 'Frankfurt' (100pts) in Barbara 'Keep Working Barb' Junghans. Excellent scoring throughout the price category, with something for everyone in the 'Make Mine Meat' stakes. Full scoring will be up on the web shortly of course - as is our style at the Summer Series Showroom.

A couple of final points to conclude a wonderful evening of 'Jamie's 204 Ways With Lamb'. Did you hear of Michael and Connie getting their car 'bogged' putting out controls! Where, which one?? A prize  for the first correct answer. And Richard 'The King' downloading after his top run - into a 'Clear' Si box!! Nearly lost the lot, but recovered by a quick thinking Foot (was this you Andy?). Phew!

So thanks Michael for another cracker, and to the other Feet for helping (good to see 'The King of the Rock' there). A great night eating Peking Duck - and a tasty Reschs to follow.

Next week Gordy is leading the Bennelong team in our traditional pre Christmas run at Balmoral. Although the focus is expected to be Balmoralish with a whiff of beach and the excellent old tramway line cutting, we are starting up the top at Suakin Drive, so expect a little Contour Kate in the mix. This is an outstanding venue of course, and Gordon knows how to dampen the running top. Expect fireworks from the BNO star as we ease into the holidays, with fish & chips on the beach, or pot pie at the pub, as temptations to end the evening - and almost our first half. Make it a date.

 



    

UMPIRE CALLS 'WIDE' AS SANCTUARY STYMIES SIX STARS

Chief Boronia Park groundsman, Dmitry 'The Heavy Roller' Stokov, had the boundary rope well beyond the normal field dimensions in last nights 20/20 challenge at Epping. Indeed, such was the width of 'The Rollers' deployment, that arriving teams were forced to field back up and part time batsmen in order to bolster what loomed as a night of dot balls. And as the Wisden reporter packed up his trusty pencil, the senior sheet told a sorry tale - with only two batsmen playing all 600 deliveries, and hardly anyone managed a five!

Despite the uncharacteristicly slow pitch, and the dearth of high scoring, round ten attracted a good crowd - with 209 paying at the turnstiles, and another 16 or so being admitted to the outer under Group pass arrangements. The run of good SSS weather saw teams taking to the field in mild mid/low 20 degree conditions - ideal for a steady accumulation of runs, that is until they saw how the curator had prepared the ground, and its green top.  

The click of turnstile and clink of coin delivered a landscape format match programme that drew initial gasps from team managers. Look at the spread, the width, the distance between wickets! Dmitry looked to have gone west with the enthusiasm of John Wayne in dusty chaps. Apart from the daunting control spread, another curiosity was noted - 'The Heavy Roller' had angled the paddock to get more sun on the centre pitch, giving the north lines a drunken lean (somewhat akin to the many well lubricated patrons from Wee Waa's finest families, often seen holding forth in the members bar at the SCG).

This was our second match at The Sanctuary, although the first to use the Boronia Park Pavilion. The course looked very wide, very very wide, and instinctively, runners thought more of a defensive shot through the covers than a hook to backward point. It had that effect. A three would be good scoring, with very few expected to post a six over the brickpit chimney. What was probably the most disappointing to our lower order players was the amount of points well out of reach. The course seemed about 12/12.5 klms, longer than the MCC rule book recommends, and with the significant scoring well to the west (rather than only a few curly ones out there for Glenny and the King), low totals were going to be the order of the day. Dot, one, dot, dot, two, dot. You get the idea.

Let's look at the course in more detail.

Close to the start/finish we had a nice ten/twenty that attracted significant interest. There was a nice connect running clockwise from these two that led to the Sanctuary itself (and its tough forty point ask), and a loop west to the brick pit and the upper reaches of Terry (Murphy) Creek. Here westerly extensions drew batsmen from their crease, often to their regret, chasing a boundary or two before realising the lunch break was coming up and the need to completing the circle. The puff O meter was often in full deployment as the long run home took its toll on poor footwork and timing.

Most seemed to feel the pull of a clockwise circuit, typically running 1,16 (not sure why the map showed green on this leg, when it was an all clear track??!!),27,13,28 (most ignoring 11/12),18,22,30 and some sort of construction via 9,23,8,21 (hopefully) and a series of dot balls home. On this loop, the in/out to 18 had the flavour of a Billy Bowden crocked finger 'six' indication, with the clue change catching a few. Number thirty required exertion, whilst the run connecting 22 to 23 rewarded those that like to feel their spikes bite into the couch.

Although most traffic seemed to be clockwise, a few took off westwards bagging 17,14,21,8 before drinks at Terry's. If you had the runs in you, working the ball off the pads towards long on, and going 21,29 (ignore #4 - probably our lonely pot),24,20,19 and 25,6 to the creek, had its reward - and could result in team selection for the Hobart test. In this outer ring, #5 at short cover also distracted, and might have run #4 for 12th man duties. The fiddling around in this 5,24,20 area needed concentration to avoid a run out, and was a nice part of the map, and the setting. Just a pity it was so far from home for the majority of the players.

I've mentioned the Sanctuary being a low reward for effort, but note 'Not' Terry 'Creek' Bluett got in a bit of O practice by legging these two twenties in his 280 LM point total. The cool hand of Contour Kate also was at work here, keeping many a batsman from chancing a cheeky run. Number 28 also required a bit of a drop to secure, but not the effort of the Sanctuary twins and as a consequence, had more fans. Most other points and locations were clear enough (when you got to them), with only a few reporting slow running at #23 to the third umpire. 'The Cucumber' reports lost time at #2 for some reason, but not to quite the same extend as his recent innings for the Central Coast Cowboys at Lake Haven - where his middle order innings ended in LBW after arguing with officials.

Nice to see the small O flags once again, and the WHO mob in full regalia. A toughie Dmitry, and a rather low scoring flog, but lets take a look at the team performance before repairing to the Ladies Stand and a chance to meet our country cousins.

Our top score was 520 runs from WHO's opening bat, Andrew 'Graeme Gooch' Hill. This is a welcome win for Andy who has been shaded in recent innings by some strong colts from the Garingal team. Most of the other winning scores in the age divisions were exceptional runs - and much as expected, with perhaps a few of them to remark upon here. Firstly no sub juniors - a surprise as young Dunk is usually the first to pad up in the SJM, and we have been enjoying the exploits of sister Ellen or 'The Mayor'. Secondly, we see a remarkable run from Mal 'The Nail Gun' Ramsey, taking the honours in JM with 400 to shade 'The Mattress' by ten. Michele Dawson wins in JW with a quiet 260, and the only post in this category, while Gill took the long handle to the Open Women bowling, piling on 460 to go past Wendy - out for 430 after a reverse sweep skied to square leg.

Greg 'The Oil Rig' Barbour was in good touch in the vets, shading an earlier innings from Mike Burton (510/490), while in VW, Karen 'The Holiday Cottage' Blatchford ran 350 to outpace Paula. Karen has been Newcastle's form batswoman of late, and didn't disappoint here. Another score perhaps worth a smudge of the 2B - the three equal winners in WaM, with 'The Clay Pan', 'The 70's' and 'The Glove' all posting 230's.

As this season has seen the last test for 'Punter' Ponting, Pork Pie thought he would look for a likely replacement bat for the number four position from within the SSS ranks - and offers the following 4th placegetters: In the mens team, JM's Michael 'Darling Harbour' Brereton (230 after a 57.40 outing), Mark Schaefer (OM with 480 points), Neil 'The Organ' Lefevre (MM, 420), Malcolm 'Motto Guzzi' Bradley (a nice 430 in VM), Ian 'Doc' Cameron in SVM with 330 (this is technically 5th, as we had three SV batsmen in equal 2nd), Dave Lotty in the Legends (290, including consecutive boundaries over silly mid off), and Lloyd Gledhill's 250 in IM. Our women's team offers, Clare 'The Tattoo' Williams from IK with 390 in OW, Louise Brierty (300 in MW), Helen MacDonald (clearly benefiting from brother Alan's bowling instruction, with 270 in VW), Carol & Debbie with equal 4ths in SVW (250's), and Hannah & Robbie in the groups - with 190.

I've mentioned we only had two 600 runners, Glenn (home in 53.46 for his 510) and Lee 'The Enigma' Coady - working the slower ball for 350pts in his long stay (69.01!!) at the crease. The cruel second strikes again, but helps to confer Lee with the special 'longest at the crease' award. Something we wished Ricky had achieved in Perth.

Our most popular scores were three groups of eleven batsmen each (you can see where the theme is coming from!). Team 280 with several Garingal stars, including Lisa 'Linseed Oil' Linssen as captain and TKF Cox as wicketkeeper, are in group recovery after just not quite getting to the 300 run mark that would have ensured a Christmas bonus. Alison Curtin went closest, having thrown the bat at 360 points, but underestimated her return run. 'The Venetian Blind' is hoping coach Miller will forgive.  Team 260 included a range of ages amongst its players, and were ably led by opening bat Rod Eckles 'Cakes' and his partner at the crease Mitchell 'Hoping For A' Bye.  Also noted amongst this inner city team are captain Duncan 'Kings' Cross and cunning leg spin bowler Chris 'The Googly' Cunningham. Lastly we have the eleven 240's. This team included several well known players, including legendary fast bowler 'Tearaway' Ted Dexter...oops, Mulherin, Clifford 'Ted' Heath (captained the parliamentary team in 1980), and specialist number five Nicole 'Pup' Sellin. Junior star Kaj Bollerup is also noted in this line up, and feared for his away swing bowling. 'Bowl 'em up Kaj' is the cry as our 240's take the field.

Some good Group scoring this round, including the tidy 370 runs from Annaliza and Michael Merryment, and, by way of contrast, Heidi & Angus not liking the off cutter in their modest 100 pt post. Dave Stitt is noted 'groupless' this innings, posting 180 after a 65.01 (another 1"!!) occupation of the crease.

There are many other interesting and amazing scores, generally of more modest proportions than many of the fancies will be used to, but there you go! Big thanks to Dmitry and the WHO crew for putting on another SSS biggie - and failing to tempt The Pork Chop once again into the arms of The Sanctuary! Next time maybe, but it will have to need several thirty pointers I suspect. Be also good to see the area around the old brick plant finished, and maybe a checkpoint on the chimney!

Next week sees the Feet taking off their socks once again, this time giving the lower limbs a touch of carnivorous running as we tackle Butchers Block Point and the delights of Longueville. 'The Planets' is our course setter, and one hopes he keeps his natural speed and spread in check as he places pots perspicaciously with us mere mortals in mind. This is always a great event, with its interesting mangrove and creek side tracks, the excellent harbour views and that nice touch of mortgage pressure often evident hereabouts. Make it a date, perhaps a semifinal fling, as we close in on girth expanding times and ruination by Visa.

Speaking of finals, the following event (#12) at Balmoral is our traditional pre Christmas work out at this sensational location. Although we are starting at Suakin Drive, I'm informed that the Bennelong Bunnies are going to drive us towards the beach and the waft of shark and tatie. A great way to end the first half. But wait!.... 'The Sauce Bottle' is going one better, putting up a corker on Boxing Day at Freshie to really end the year. I'll talk more about this one next week, but note than Ian is advising of earlier starts (from 3pm) with last starts at 6pm. It's a public holiday so no excuses about work causing a no show. The Manly Mayor is promising a sensation!